Earth, Sea, Space and Sky
It is the light that called to me first, through the vastness of my heart chakra, green with the promise of love and new life beckoning from beyond the grooved, webbed connections along the borders.
I can hear the sweet singing of the sky above, the earth and sea below reverberating with the sacred truths of Christ consciousness, Quan Yin, and Metatron.
Antiquities springing forth in perfect harmony transmuting space, time, and reality into a comforting healing space there for the asking.
A celestial celebration of darkness breaking through multiple layers of life affirming luminosity.
A vast orchestral feast for my eyes, heart, body, mind, and spirit, all on board for the soul journey.
Crystals chant in unison on dimensional vibrations releasing orbs, as the distant yet present voices of my ancestors, here yet there.
A night sky of infinite darkness penetrated by Pleidian starlight revealing profound clarity and dimensions like this, a mere microcosm or reflection of what lies beyond.
A network of energy created and orchestrated by the most high, Holy, God the giver of life and carried out by ascended masters, emissaries of light, angelic beings and those who have gone before paving my present way.
Circular karmic pathways, the years of life, rings of a great oak or pine, anchored by the four directions, connected to Divinity centered by a living portal through which to connect, restore, refresh and ultimately return to love.
0ne More Poem - Blog on Immunotherapy and Removal of the Node in May
Not Today
Death came for me in the cold dark night of the blood red moon while white crystals fell silently from the sky blanketing the earth in all her wisdom.
Cast your burdens upon my shoulders and rest, she said.
You have toiled so hard and your solace is well deserved.
The seductress tempted me with her familiar gaze while casting glimmers of loved ones and times gone by on the silvery walls of my soul.
She reminded me of the pain, stench, and darkness deeply lodged within my ailing body.
She cradled me in her soft sweet void drifting, comforted by the immense song of solitude increasingly far away from the laughter and luminosity of the life I once knew.
In the end, that was her fatal flaw.
The light within me shimmered, stirred and remembered the untimely for who she was.
Since that time days have grown increasingly brighter. My spirit soars and shines with a translucent brilliance, difficult to dismiss as coincidental.
Life thrives and persists in this sacred vessel from every pore and cell to the soupy marrow of my bones.
Every inch and every crevice of my being rejoices with infinite life, compassion, joy, forgiveness, gratitude, peace, patience, and mercy.
The light is not done working her way within me and I humbly yield to her alchemy and expanded purpose surrendering the wholeness of my story.
Living my days with purpose punctuated by a yearning to bring beauty, goodness and empathy to those who choose to come close.
For one day, death will return and then I shall be ready.
But that day is not today.
With love and gratitude,
MRx
Reflective Poetry
Imminent Light
Why must we wait until we are dying, destitute or diseased
to see the light?
A glimpse of heaven peered out at me from my babies’ eyes as each was placed upon my heaving breasts.
Cherubim, that is who and what we yield. Giving rise to angelic arrivals overflowing with the goodness, love, and light we spend a lifetime to remember.
I nearly dropped my candied yam boy when he gazed knowingly into my weary soul. He made it clear, he knew me.
My honeycomb girl, she sang and smiled at dust dancing along golden sunbeams for nearly a year before letting us in.
‘Children on the spectrum? A relation wondered. Yes, the spectrum of light. When my luminosity was at odds, I turned to them.
Still warmed by their inner sun, my progeny evoked divine secrets and incantations from sacred indigo places only they could recall.
And daily they heal me with candyfloss cuddles laced with bubbled laughter
pure joy springing up from the brightest places of all.
Before the dawn of our darkness, we must learn to set aside surrogate, human-crafted, counterfeit luminary devices, and return to divine source.
We must close our eyes long enough to remember that here and now, then and only then may we again see the light.
With love and gratitude,
MRx
0ne Year Ago...A Return to Spirit
I was slow to write this month because of the gravity of remembering what occurred. It was dark, dreary, and gray. The Auckland Summer was threatening to disappear and transform itself into the familiar cold, wet winter, that I loathed. My neighbor Deirdre had become my BFF and confidante (many thanks to you Deirdre) as I was home alone for a while with husband and kids in the US enjoying the end of their Winter break. I thought a lot about life and death and everything in-between. My sister Kim was there for the first surgery the Doctors scheduled just to make sure the diagnosis was correct: Urothelial carcinoma (UCC, also transitional cell carcinoma or TCC) a type of cancer that typically occurs in the urinary system: the kidney, urinary bladder, and accessory organs. It is the most common type of bladder cancer and cancer of the ureter, urethra, and urachus; but mine was Stage IV and up in and around my kidney. A rare location and one found in older Chinese and English men working in toxic factories in the early 1900's. Later, when Cristina my sister in law joined us for the removal of the kidney, learned the small mass had branched into 10 out of 15 lymph nodes along my abdominal aorta.
Still later we would learn there was one 'rogue node' that was not removed because it was located in my neck behind my clavicle far from the original tumor site. We would not have found the node if I hadn't been stricken, yes, stricken , with a severe dose of peripheral neuropathy(nerve damage) from the cisplatin and gemcitabine chemo cocktail I was served every three weeks for from March through June of 2016 (loving thanks to Michele, MaryAnne, Nathalia and Katie my chemo sitting comadres). The September MRI to rule out a spinal cord tumor or damage to my central nervous system yielded the discovery of an abnormal lymph node in my neck. I did't learn about this post-surgery, post-chemo node until November. We are thankful to God that it wasn't new, but was 'missed' in the initial diagnosis because Doctors weren't looking for a urinary system cancer in my neck. It was far from home. Not worse, not better, just far. More about the rogue node later. And know that it is gone now, as of March 16, 2017.
If this or something like this is happening with you (or a loved one) right now and this is where you are, please know that in these instances we need to surround ourselves with love, light, and people who love us unconditionally. We need to connect if we haven't already to spirit through Source whatever that means for us. It is also imperative for our future healing to forgive, forget, and surrender any controlling ways of being. We all have a limited amount of energy packets a day. Use them to heal your life so that you can give yourself the care your need and be of service to others again in the future.
For me, this meant remembering and honoring the steadfast prayer-life and faithful ways of my Southern Baptist parents and their peoples as far back as possible. In my case this includes the reality of universal, inclusive, and Indigenous belief systems that may be older than what we understand to be Christian or even Western in nature. Still, I was born in and partially raised in Spain which was a devoutly Catholic country. My life and surroundings kept me open and aware that God looks different to different people and that at the end of the day God is still God--- Glorious, Magnificent, Loving, Gracious, Creative, Limitless, and Good. As a Catholic adult with a non-denominational Christian background, I have studied the Bible and along the way read many other sacred scriptures. Today, I find that the Holy Trinity and teachings of Jesus Christ remain deep within my spiritual signature. I am anchored, comforted, and find solace in my faith, which is what I wish for every other person in the world who is going through a similar situation. To thine own self be true.
So as I reflect, these three things got me through and may also work for you (or your loved one) a year ago when I was hit with the reality of a life threatening diagnosis:
1. For your mind, refrain from reading too much on the internet. Instead, consult books on healing that resonate with your philosophical underpinnings.
2. For your spirit, sit with yourself and remember or reflect on the spirituality that your parents, grandparents, or great-grandparents.Understand that whatever their belief system was, it is partially responsible for your being here today. I am convinced that beyond biology, you are here as a miraculous result of love, intention, and intelligent design. Who did your people revere? Find that source and tap into now. If you don't have a Source begin exploring spirit to see what all the fuss is about. I am sure you will find something that resonates with you.
3. For your body, incorporate some of the practices found in your spiritual inheritance daily. For me it was prayer, meditation, deep breathing, eating whole foods with appropriate supplements, and practicing yoga.
These are the things that got me through initially. As we go, I will share more. Please connect with me through the site or subscribe to the MRIIW Newsletter for more insights.
With love and gratitude,
MRx
New Beginnings
No better time to begin than the present...
The passion behind Many Rivers II Wellness comes out of my ongoing journey from imbalance to a place of peace initiated by a recent (Christmas Eve 2015) diagnosis and experience with a rare form of kidney cancer. This was followed by two surgeries in February 2016 including the removal of my left kidney and nearby lymph nodes, four months of chemotherapy (I am thankful for modern medicine, skillful surgeons, and knowledgeable doctors); herbal supplements, reiki, energy work, Indigenous healing modalities, acupuncture, yoga, breath work, meditation, and mindfulness (love and gratitude to all of the lovely ones who worked with me toward health and maintaining the highest vibration possible) .
In January 2017 I relocated from the beautiful Aotearoa New Zealand (much more on that later) to the United States to receive immunotherapy for my specific cancer diagnosis. I am currently healing from this dis-ease as well as chemotherapy induced peripheral neuropathy (CIPN) (nerve damage) to my hands, feet, forearms, and knee to ankles.
While I was physically healthy and active, I relied on prayer, yoga (e.g., asana, pranayama, pratyahara), mindfulness, and meditation for their calming effects. When I lost the ability to move as I had when I was healthier, these modalities were the only things left that I could do. These, in combination with fervent prayer, the healing hands of energy workers, and the wisdom and skills offered by complementary medicine, carried me forward and brought me here where I stand today.
Divine ancient and often sacred practices have given me the ability to sit with love, joy, peace, and gratitude in my heart and a burning desire to share the healing power of a yogic approach with those in need as well as those who yearn for and desire increased wellness, balance, and stillness in their lives.
In this space, it is my intention that you will find a yoga practice for you and for all people, accessible meditations for any occasion, a variety of healing modalities that worked for me over the course of regaining balance, and a blog reflecting stories, poetry, and lifestyle enhancements to complement your journey to wellness. Over the course of time through my experiences I have learned, there are many rivers to wellness and I am delighted to share each of mine with you.
With love and gratitude,
MRx